How can I be sex-positive and a Christian at the same time? Because I love Christ and I love helping people reverse sexual shame, repression, and negativity. I share why in this video.
Talking with Young People About Consent [video]
Join Micki and her daughter as they discuss the important topic of sexual consent. Consent is Clear (an enthusiastic “yes!”), Continuous (can be revoked or retracted at any time), Conscious (informed and sober), and Coercion-free (not “guilted” or manipulated).
The number 1 reason for PAIN involved with SEX Revealed [Guest Post by Myola Woods]
One in Three Women experiences pain during sex. Why is this so … and can we do something about it?
The good news is, we can do something about it. Imagine living in a world where people had sex and felt pleasure and ecstasy – we would be living in a new paradigm.
Here it is, the number 1 reason for painful sex is (insert drum roll)…….
Tension…. ( And no, I don’t mean the good sexy sexual tension )… I mean body tension, mental tension, emotional tension, a spiritual tension of oneself.
When we have tension in our bodies – in simple terms – when our nervous system is in fight and flight, our psoas muscle (along with others) contract, upsetting our digestion, our pelvis and doesn’t send the arousing messages we want…and need in our bodies.
Even if we can get our nervous system to relax, often we have years of tension in our pelvises and genitals. I hear you saying “Myola… please explain!???”
Have you ever had or noticed tension in your neck or shoulders? Our pelvises and genitals are no different as body parts they store tension and in particular, they also have added tension from possibly years of uncomfortable menstruating, birthing, holding, contracting, not to mention if there are trauma and abuse.
With all this built up muscular and body contraction and tension, it can be very difficult to have pleasure or… to even notice pleasure and arousal!!!
All this tension, how do we let it go…
Here are my 5 steps to REMOVING TENSION in and from the body:
- Slow down and breath deeply, notice what is happening in your body, are you aware of the tension, where is it? If you bring further attention to your pelvis… what do you notice?
- Often the word ‘relax’ does not help, after working with many clients the word ‘soften’ seems to have a better result… try words on for yourself and allowing the body to soften, hmmm asking where else can my body soften? How much more could I soften.
- Put your hands on your pelvis / and or genitals and intending to breath into these areas and notice what is happening, what can you notice with your hands and what can you notice from the inside of the body as you are holding it?
- Is there anything to be spoken about, often tension is caused because we hold back our emotions, our words, our feelings – the good, the bad and the ugly if not expressed WILL find a way to be stored in the body. It is not always appropriate or possible to have to speak with an actual person, it is more often important that the body feels and finds a way to express itself.
- Ask the body, I know we think the body knows nothing and often we override it and tell it what to do, eat and wear. When we build communication with the body in some of the simplest conversations we build trust and know, we can then move to more crucial topics. One of the best ways is to ask the body if it is ready for intimacy, sex and penetration, because it is happening either ‘to’ or ‘with’ the body…. Which would YOU prefer?
These steps take practice, they take time, they take slowness to really appreciate our bodies, the messages and how it speaks to and through us.
Many of my clients come to me in pain and they have tried many, many, many ways (that’s lots!) to get out of the pain, for all of them it is a journey of deep self discovery, softening and opening to a new way of being
When most of my new clients come to me, the pleasure was really the last thing on their minds… they just didn’t want pain!… Once the pain was taken care of and in stages, they learned, remembered, enjoyed and looked forward to pleasure as their new ‘normal’.
Pleasure is a paradigm a choice and we can move from PAIN to PLEASURE…..With a whole lotta fun in between!!!
Let’s get started… your transformation begins now!
Myola Woods is an Author, Certified Sexological Bodyworker, Somatic Sex Educator and International Intimacy & Relationship Coach.
Myola is a pioneer with courage who bravely speaks about the things that make most of us uncomfortable… Myola will gently lead you out of your comfort zone and into the zone of personal growth and higher self awareness.
Myola specialises in teaching individuals and couples the art of connection, creating and cultivating the choice of arousal, to deepen intimacy, sensation and pleasure … even if it has been a very long time!
As a Sexual being, mother of 4 teenagers and pleasure enthusiast, Myola appreciates the time constraints, daily and social pressures, that can play havoc on our erotic lives. Myola teaches ways to explore and enhance your love making in everyday life. Using techniques and practices that can turn you, and your life, ON.
Take your intimate life from ordinary to extraordinary! Have the orgasms you have read and dreamed about….. YOU deserve them!
So, if you have had enough of mediocre, ready for change and desiring intimacy, connection and arousal, STOP wishing and hoping and START Now! Contact Myola TODAY!. firstname.lastname@example.org 0423919270 http://www.eroticcoaching.com.au
The Merry Month of May…sturbation
Traditional May Celebrations
Traditionally, the month of May marks the return of springtime in the Northern Hemisphere. The first day of May, also known as May Day, is still celebrated in many parts of the globe. The ancient Celts called May Day “Beltane”—the day halfway between spring and summer as the time of fecundity and growth.
Because of its pagan origins, over the centuries, the May Day celebrations were actually banned. But they kept reappearing and, over time, the spring dances and festivals associated with it became more accepted. The revelries were adopted by other cultures with less sexual tones so that now, even religious persons anticipate the month for various reasons.
May as International Masturbation Month
The first National Masturbation Day was observed May 14, 1995, after a sex-positive retailer declared the day in honor of Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders, who suggested that masturbation be added as part of the sex education curriculum in the United States. If only our young people were so fortunate! Anyhooo…. The prominent day was soon adopted by other Western countries and is now so popular a concept that May is celebrated as International Masturbation Month.
Fact vs Fiction about Masturbation
For the record, masturbation is totally natural — and yes, it is normal to masturbate, whether you’re sexually active in a relationship or not. There are tons of myths meant to scare you into thinking masturbation is wrong or bad. They’re actually scare-tactics left over from a bygone era. If you haven’t seen my video which dispels common masturbation myths, you may watch it here.
If you’re uncomfortable with the idea of masturbation, especially for religious reasons, you may find some helpful information here. If you’re unsure about finding your pleasure zones for masturbation, be sure to check out my article on Searching for Your Buried Pleasure here. Not only is masturbation completely natural, masturbation even has these potential health benefits:
- releases sexual tension
- relieves muscle tension
- eases headaches
- relieves menstrual cramps
- reduces stress and anxiety
- helps you sleep better
- improves your self-esteem and body image
- helps treat various sexual problems
- strengthens the muscle tone in your pelvic floor (which supports your bladder, uterus, and anal area)
Masturbation, whether solo or with your partner (mutual masturbation), can also significantly improve your love life. It allows you to both be vulnerable with one another in a loving way, which always improves communication with a trusted loved one. Learning your pleasure points and those of your lover is also a terrific way to communicate intimately with your lover and help you both bring more pleasure to one another during lovemaking.
You Have a Right to Enjoy Your Body and Your Sexuality
Our bodies and our sexuality are both God-given gifts. May is a time to celebrate both fertility and growth; as you can imagine, this time of year is great for getting in touch with your body (literally), your sexuality, and your lover! If you’re having trouble in any of these areas, now may be the perfect time to reach out and schedule a session with me.
Enjoy the Merry Month of May!
Hairy Palms and Other Masturbation Myths [video]
Hairy palms, blindness, and several other common BS myths surrounding masturbation are dispelled in this short, affirming video. Thank you for watching!
Q & A: Why Don’t Women Climax As Easily as Men?
Question: “I understand that the clitoris has as many, or possibly even more, nerve endings than the glans of the penis. Since the glans of the clitoris is smaller than the glans of the penis these nerve endings are closer together thus making the clitoris very sensitive. So why is it that so many women seem to need vibrator stimulation in order to climax while men climax quite easily with just manual stimulation?” O.G.
Answer: Some women are actually overstimulated by clitoral vibrations. Each woman’s body is so very different. Some need only a bit of manual stimulation and some need a lot, and some require vibes. Some don’t like direct clitoral stimulation at all. Also, because the external clitoris is “hidden” under a fold of skin (the hood), it does not usually receive enough stimulation during coitus — whereas the penis is literally CENTRAL to the sex act for men.
Some researchers have found that orgasms tend to have “use it or lose it” patterns. Since male masturbation is more culturally acceptable, young men begin masturbating at an earlier age. Some women never do. These research findings lean towards “proof” that it’s actually more common for men to climax “more readily” than women in general.
Also, arousal and orgasms actually happen in the brain. And, it’s been scientifically proven time and again that women’s arousal response (in general) is a slower burn — HOWEVER, the average time for direct stimulation for men to climax is four minutes — almost exactly the same average time for women [who are already in a state of arousal] to climax with clitoral stimulation. Food for thought?
Another reason may be religious repression. Women grow up with the adage that “good girls” don’t have sex until marriage — and even then, they are expected to just do it for their husband’s pleasure or for the sake of the marriage. This type of shame-filled message is not conducive to a healthy outlook on sexuality, especially one that calls for enjoyment, for women and can actually be quite harmful. How’s a gal to climax with all that garbage in her head?
Why Aren’t We Having Sex Now? How to Stop Fighting About Sexual Frequency (Guest Post by Sylvia Smith via When Women Inspire)
Intimacy issues in a relationship can be uncomfortable to talk about. Not having sex? Learn how to communicate about sexual frequency effectively from relationship expert Sylvia Smith.
via Why Aren’t We Having Sex Now? How to Stop Fighting About Sexual Frequency (Guest Post) — When Women Inspire
My Thoughts on Pornography [video]
As an adult sex and pleasure educator and relationship coach, I’m often asked about my thoughts on the adult entertainment industry. Well, in a sense, I work in the adult entertainment industry! Alas, Pornography – Are you Pro or Con? is the subject of my latest video. See if you can follow along as I go back in forth between the pros and cons of the adult entertainment industry. [Please note: the content is not graphic and is age-restricted by me simply for the subject matter.]
How to Help Your Children Become Responsible and Community-Focused — When Women Inspire
Caring for our neighbors is an especially important life lesson in an increasingly isolated world. Building relationships outside of our homes is an important life lesson to share with our wee ones. Check out Christy’s thoughtful and thought-provoking article over at When Women Inspire [link below photo].
As a parent, you likely want your kids to be an active part of the community and to enjoy their role in it. So, how can you make that happen?
via How to Help Your Children Become Responsible and Community-Focused — When Women Inspire
3 Lies We Believe About Marriage
3 Lies We Believe About Marriage covers three big lies that we believe that may be harming our relationship and what can be done about them. Looking for help with your marriage or committed relationship? Contact me for a complimentary Discovery Call today. You deserve to be in a happy, healthy relationship. You are worth it!